America's Obsession with Media and Reality Television. (Osama the Star)

I am indeed a gambling man, and i would bet it all that if Osama Bin Ladin was somehow pardoned for his crimes by the president, virtually ALL of the "Patriotic Americans" that took to the streets cheering "America FUCK YEAH" and celebrating his death would in fact TUNE IN to a reality show starring him if he was given one. Oh sure, at first everyone would be up in arms about the pardon.

Then all the tough guys would emerge vowing to "take him out" themselves.

But then, Americans would all tune into a show about Osama's new life in a Miami Beach loft where he was protected from assassination by security, almost ALL of the Americans that celebrated his death, would tune in to watch the most mundane details of his new life.

These Americans tuning in would largely be made up of the 1 in 7 Americans on food stamps. (Yes that is true, 1 in 7 Americans is so broke they can not afford to eat). And those people would continue tuning in by the millions, so much so that it would make Osama's second season contract $10 million. And then they would tune in even more. And his third season he would earn $25 million and so on.

Americans are so pathetically addicted to reality television that they would make the most hated man on earth a rich man all over again just because they couldn't help it. And they would do this while starving themselves.

And then after his popularity on season 3 of "Osama Beach", Dancing with The Stars would certainly offer him a contract. And guess what? That would be the MOST WATCHED season of DWTS to date. Because these same "Patriotic Americans" that were chanting "Fuck yeah" upon his death would also be chanting "Fuck yeah" after he perfectly dipped Kirstie Alley in a Tango.

And TMZ would photograph him and interview him and make him a ladies man.

And America would tune into TMZ more than ever to look at him.

Because lets face it, any country capable of making a scumbag like "The Situation" a multi million dollar star is certainly capable of doing the same for a mass murdering son of a bitch like Osama Bin Ladin.

And that my fellow Americans is pathetically worth more than the dollar.

@justus4all

The Tallest Man In Pakistan - Osama (The Movie)

my new movie script is called "the tallest man in pakistan." in it, Osama Bin Laden lives in a mansion in the capital of our ally Pakistan and drives a Range Rover... for 7 years, while the rest of the world thinks he lives in a tent and is barefoot, and well, you all know how it ends. Or do you???

The sequel to "the tallest man in pakistan" has already been filmed--- its called the "Bourne Identity", its where a former CIA Operative (TIM OSMAN)  gets shot by navy seals and thrown overboard into the ocean. he wakes up floating in the sea and comes back to haunt the USA...i think it starred Matt Damon.

Stooooopid....

OSAMA: Ding Dong the Witch is Dead…

George Bush declared Victory for America (again.)

Really? Are the troops coming home? Did we win? 

No to both, not only aren’t the troops coming home, but they are likely going to be in more danger, as will we all, at least in the immediate future. Al Qaeda will likely be looking to make a statement response.

Now, upon news of a twitter feed of his death, the same country that demanded to see Barrack Obama’s birth certificate, was dancing in the streets singing “Ding Dong the witch is dead..” as if their favorite sports team had just won the championship.

There is one major difference however between the witch in the Wizard of Oz being dead and Osama Bin Laden being dead.

In the Wizard of Oz, the witch’s death actually meant something. It meant the death to their oppressor and they could all live happily ever after.

Osama Bin Laden’s death means nothing. It means nothing to the war in Iraq, Libya or Afghanistan, it means nothing to the deficit in a Country that Osama Bin Laden helped Bankrupt, it means nothing to the 6000 American Soldiers that America has sent to the middle east and gotten killed as a response to the 3500 that Osama killed. It means nothing to the $3 trillion dollars America spent funding the war on terror as a response to the $20 billion Osama cost us on 9/11. I mean, let’s face it, killing Osama Bin Laden will do about as much damage to Islamic Fundamentalism as killing Jesus Christ did to Christianity.

One news source said it best as far as I am concerned –

“When future historians recount what happened to America in the first decade of the new millennium, they will point to the attacks Osama bin Laden mounted on 9-11 as a turning point in global history, and see in Washington’s response a partial explanation for the nation’s subsequent decline." --- Slate

Osama’s death accomplishes NOTHING.

In fact, this non-stop news coverage and self-congratulatory American government party reeks of propaganda that would rival that of Nazi Germany. They are celebrating the falling of a fictional antihero at this point.

America killing Osama Bin Laden is on par with Al Qaeda sneaking into the US and killing Jimmy Carter. While that would be a slap in the face, nothing would change.

And although America has achieved nothing in this single event, that’s not to say nothing has been accomplished in our war efforts in the Middle East, it’s just that there are far more respectable milestones in our Middle East efforts that Americans should be celebrating. Rather than lowering ourselves to a fundamentalist’s style effigy burning in the streets. Let’s keep it classy America, a great man once said (sic) –

 "Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that." -Martin Luther King, Jr.

On a side note, they threw his body in the ocean. There is no body. The proof he is dead is now relegated to photos taken by our government and DNA evidence which proved to 99.9% odds he’s dead. To put that in perspective, those odds are the same as 1 in 1000. Those are not insurmountable odds, and in fact I have been “All in” after the flop on two poker hands I could remember where I had that same 1000 to 1 advantage and LOST. So lets not forget, there is a chance, an actual one, that this guy is not dead at all.

Let the conspiracy theories begin, for the rest of eternity.

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A little humor, below is some propaganda style footage run by CNN for over 4 hours last night, to show us what a bad man Osama Bin Laden is.

I’m throwing it in for no reason other than I think it’s hysterically funny!!!

jersey shore and mob wives - an Italian American's point of view

(Make sure you read my three new show pitches at the end, even IF you can't get through my whole commentary...)

So it seems these days it is open season on Italian Stereotypical shows on TV. There are 2 that are hugely popular, Jersey Shore and Mob Wives. Both depicting the most ugly side of Italian stereotypical culture with no positive role models or culture shown. And now there are at least 2 more spin off shows coming.

Carl's Jr. recently ran an ad for a Chicken Parm sandwich by showing an Italian eating it in the car and passing out with sauce all over him as two other Italian Murderers approach to "Whack" him. Seeing the blood red sauce they thought he was already dead and moved on. (But yet the taco bell dog is prohibited now as is THE LIME which aired for only three weeks before getting yanked)

Now Italians are not as prevalent as many other cultures in many parts of the country. Particularly in the mid west and West Coast, where many people don't know any real Italians. So they are basing what they know on Italians from Mob movies and these shows.

It's already gotten to the point that almost every time someone new meets me in LA and they find out im Italian from New York, the ridiculous follow up question is "Have you ever been to the Jersey Shore?" Which means they are already thinking of those assholes when they think of me.
I have been to the Jersey Shore. I grew up there in summers with my family and it was nice. But now....fahgetttabout it...

There is a huge difference too between shows like the Sopranos and the Godfather and this other trash. Shows like the Sopranos and the Godfather depict Historical Crime sagas that still exist in REAL Italian Culture today, particularly back in Naples and Sicily. There is nothing Historic to Italians on Mob Wives nor Jersey Shore. Furthermore, the Sopranos and the Godfather also depict other honorable aspects of the culture as well as positive role models like lawyers, doctor's, Ivy League Students, Family values, etc. Again none of this is depicted on these other TV Shows.

What's worse is on Mob Wives for instance, the real mobsters are far less honorable or civilized than their theatrical counterparts, in fact most of New York Italian Mobsters such as John Gotti were less redeemable people, murderers and not a proud part of Italian Culture all the same. Tony Soprano is somewhat more honorable, and lets not forget, FICTIONAL. Mob Wives does not depict any real honor or redemption, instead it feeds on desperate Italian Woman and exploits the tough times they have been through.

That all being said there are NO REALITY shows that focus on one particular culture like the Italians on TV. Back in the day Seinfeld ran an episode featuring the Puerto Rican Parade, where they stereotyped the parade and Puerto Ricans as doing EXACTLY what the jersey shore and mob wives shows. That episode of Seinfeld aired one time and was yanked altogether. But for some reason Italians are fair game??? And now they are actually going to film season four in a historical part of Italy??? well here's 3 OTHER SHOWS i'm pitching, I hope VH1 or MTV picks these up too...

THE QUEENS-
A house on Fire Island where 4 flamboyantly gay Men live together and they do drugs, party, sleep with anyone and everyone, they have slap fights and hissy fits and then for season 4 we are going to film in Massachusetts where they will all get married as they offend anyone and everyone they come in contact with by acting like Andy Dick in Old School...

HARELM STEPS-
The show will depict the summertime lives of 5 black kids that hang out on the steps of their Harlem Brownstones drinking beer, smoking blunts, and beating women, and then season 4 we are going to film in Africa.

CHINESE KITCHENS-
The show will depict the after hours lives of 5 NYC Chinatown teens after they get off work from their parents restaurants jobs where they will smoke cigarettes, get tattoos, shoot dice and commit crime. And then we will film season 4 in Shanghai...(As if the Chinese gov would ever allow us to film there...)

IF any of those shows I pitch get picked up, do you think they will ever be allowed to air?

Neither do I, nor should they. And Mob Wives and Jersey Shore should not be allowed to air either. It's a double standard...

But hey, I AM actually going to pitch my treatments for these shows, so ya never know...

Stay Tuned...